Monday, August 16, 2010

Mummylicious takes on one current issue

I don't usually like to blog about political and/or current issues but sometimes, some stories remain unchanged and too distressing not to write about. 

Anyone who merely glance at the news topic would know that Malaysia's top moral issue now is abandoned babies. Previously, as a single woman, it was disturbing but now as a mother, it has become heartbreaking. For every child that died while abandoned, a pin get stabbed into my heart. In my mind, that child could have been Baby PP. That child could be mine. That innocent child could have smiled like Baby PP is smiling now. Could have laughed like she is now. But that child could never smile or laugh. Because humanity deserted his or her parents and left her to die. 

Recently Malaysian Cabinet has agreed to a proposal to investigate and charge those who abandoned their baby which resulted to their death as murder. 

In my opinion. It is murder. And please proceed dear government.

That is not what pissed me off and made me want to write about this. What evoked me was certain parties reaction to it as reported by Malaysian dailies. 
“If we do not help them and resort to punishing them, then we are treating women who abandoned their babies as criminals,” said MCA president Datuk Seri Dr Chua Soi Lek.
I think Dr Chua is confusing two totally different issues.
1. unwanted pregnancies
2. leaving a child to its death

And then the statement from Shelter Home executive director James Nayagam
 “It’s difficult to prove murder. We have to prove that there is intent but when a foetus is aborted at three or four months, there is no chance for the baby to survive and hence, no killing is involved,” he said.

The mother might say that she left the baby to be picked up by people and not with the intent of killing the child, he said.

A woman might fear being charged with murder if she intends to abandon her baby and might instead resort to illegal abortion, said Nayagam.

There are so many wrongs in the statements

1. Treating women with unwanted pregnancy then abandon their babies as criminals.

Dr Chua. One...we are talking about death of innocents here. When death is the result of mothers abandoning innocent baby that most likely only breathe the air of the world in less than 24 hours, the mothers that allow that to happen and anyone involved are murderers. If death is not the result, they are merely without heart. does one help someone who have already abandoned they baby to death? how? its a different matter if the mother is still pregnant, extreme counseling and help should be offered, of course. lives can still be saved then.

2. Hard to prove intention of mothers when she abandons the baby

When one INTENDS to merely abandon her baby, does that not include in child endangerment? Does that not be included in accidental murder? Isnt that against the law too?

If I were to leave my baby at home alone with a bowl of baby food next to her for a day with INTEND to teach her to feed herself, is that okay? you can't proof it was done under "PARENTING"? Opps. sorry that she didn't eat the whole day because i really thought she would. 

Just like some so called human beings thought that by leaving a baby wrapped in a blanket in front of a shoplot when noone is around and hope by all hope that someone will find the baby before the insects, the dogs or some lunatic who thinks nothing about causing harm to the baby. The so called human being really thought someone would find the baby. regardless that the baby was left at the location for 7 hours alone without a soul in sight.

The proposal said "abandoned babies resulting in death, should be investigated under Section 302 of the Penal Code for murder." ...the key terms: resulting in death. 

When you intentionally puts a baby in the middle of the road hoping for cars to stop, that is attempted murder. Same goes for abandoned baby. but when death is the result for hoping against hope. that is murder.

3. Illegal abortions will increase with fear of being charged with murder

Illegal abortion is done not because one is afraid to be charged with murder. Illegal abortion is done because one is afraid to live up to the responsibilities of being with a child out or within wedlock. Illegal abortion is done because people are afraid of society scorn towards out of wedlock pregnancy. Illegal abortion is done because people are afraid that government hospitals and clinics with judge them and report them to the moral police. 

Again. Illegal abortion is about not about abandoning innocent perfectly born full term babies! Its a different issue.

But Mr Nayagam said one thing I agreed upon. Education is the key.

Educating the young that sex before wedlock is wrong is not sufficient. Lets admit it, the society is changing, and lets not push the religion factor in. Yes sex before wedlock is wrong yadayadayada. That have been drilled in our brain HUNDREDS of years through various religions! but does it stop people who are not married to do so? I think the various cases of child abandonment have answered that.

Our sex education should cover all the other basics such as having safe sex. Now before i get stoned for condoning this, i like to say knowledge does not stop acts being committed but neither does ignorance. At the very least, let the girls know their right in protecting themselves from unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. If they are going to do it anyway, let them do it safely with condoms, the pills and knowledge of morning after pills. Those that could not refrain themselves from having out of wedlock sex should really be told that simply "having sex = baby = what are you going to do then?". Education of responsibilities should be in place.

Awareness of what to do in case of unwanted pregnancy before and after it occur should also be in place. They need to have a safe place they can turn to where they know no one will judge them or force them to inform their parents but instead to counsel them when they are in distressed. A safe haven. and a mere teacher will not do. Give them the list of choices available. What are the pros and cons of having an abortion? legal or illegal? do they know that when an abortion is done wrongly, death can be one of the consequences? or even the inability to be pregnant again when you actually want to be? does anyone inform the young ones about these? Surely with those information ready at hand without them panicking looking for them is a better solution to minimise illegal abortion than to NOT approve of this new law. With a safeguard for giving a child up for adoption and options such as no questions asked Baby Hatch, baby abandonment can be avoided. And hopefully, death of the innocents.

In my view, if the government does not approve such murder investigation and charge for baby abandonment that result to death, noone will claim responsibility, nothing will change. There will still be babies left in garbage area because their parents hope someone will find it in the midst of all the unwanted items, because that was what those babies are....unwanted. But for all the unwanted babies out there, i am sure with all my heart, someone would have wanted those babies and given them all the love they needed. 


marikosan said...

agreed wt u. kes buang bayi makin menjadi and its getting worse everyday

Bidadari said...

i agree with you cuz.

at times, i would menangis when i see all the reports. readers sees the censored pixs, i could see the real pixs in the system.

it really is heartwrenching.

kalau orang taknak baby depa, bagilah kat orang lain yg lebih deserve them..(heck, i don;t mind having them kalau depa takmo)...

education is the key. and let it start with us as parents.

Mummylicious said...

cant imagine seeing the photos that were not approved. seeing those that were is heartbreaking enough.

i dont know how these people can live with it. if it was me, i would rather live with the shame than to abandon my baby at God knows where.

there are so many other places they could approach to leave their babies. a safe place to be cared for. a safe family or instituition but they keep taking short cuts without thoughts!

this issue is not just religious but basic humanity.

education is the key and if people want to have sex, go ahead, their sin is with God but they need to use condoms and pills if they dont want to have babies.

argh makes me so angry.

also as a note: pregnancy from rape victims are excluded from my rage. my heart goes to the victim but again, if they choose to abandon the baby, then they became from victims to predators themselves. the authorities must address the possible post traumatic syndromes of pregnancy rape early. There is so much lacking for victims support, and then it becomes too late.

what is wrong in our system? what is wrong with our moral conscious? why does this keep happening?